In The Middle of Nowhere
by thesunshinekid
Summary: Even as a vampire, Edward is not infallible. What is it with men and asking for directions?


**Author's Note: I do not own Twilight, or any of its respective characters.**

**Also, I have no idea where the inspiration for the events in this story came from – it seemed to write itself.**

The Middle of Nowhere:

I had become so occupied with watching Edward's entrancing facial expressions that I missed it when we left the forest behind. When I finally heard my stomach rumbling, and chose to ignore Edward's condescending chuckle, I asked, "How much further?"

"We should be there soon." My boyfriend told me, smiling. I melted into that smile for another half hour, before my stomach grumbled again, louder and more urgently.

"Are we not there yet?" I wondered aloud. I must have sounded either petulant or indignant, because Edward took offense.

"Do you not trust me?"

"Of course, I trust you." I replied, almost automatically. A rusty old tractor turned down a small side road, and I noticed that we were passing a field of cattle – were we even in Washington anymore?

"Edward," I began, choosing my words carefully, "Where, exactly, are you taking me?"

"This wonderful new restaurant in Port Angeles," He replied, not missing a beat, "well, at least, Jessica told Mike it was wonderful, and Angela kept thanking Ben for their date there last weekend. 'Cause, you know, it's not like I can personally verify those claims."

I would have laughed, but I was plagued by confusion. "If we're headed to Port Angeles, why did we get onto the highway in the complete opposite direction?"

"We did not!" He was incensed. He stared straight ahead for five minutes before losing the determined look from his face. "We did, because I was temporarily distracted with much prettier things."

I ignored the compliment when I realized that the Volvo wasn't stopping, or setting up to turn around. "Well, are we just going to keep driving into the middle of nowhere?"

"Sooner or later, we'll find a town, and get you some food." Edward spoke reassuringly, and I sank into his eyes.

But, twenty minutes later, I couldn't take it. "Edward! Pull over!"

"Why?" He growled, preparing to defend me from any unseen dangers lurking about, "What's wrong?"

"There are no towns nearby! And there hasn't been any other traffic on this road for miles! You've been driving at speeds more than illegal for nearly two hours! Who knows how many state and or country borders we've crossed! If we keep going, we'll disappear off the face of the earth!"

"Bella, really…" Edward trailed off, but realized that I was speaking the truth, if not a little agitated. A yellow sports car passed, and I opened my mouth to tell Edward to follow, but he stopped me. "At least be quiet for a minute or two so that I can focus."

"Not like you'll hear anything!" I stormed. "There's nothing but cows, and they wont be able to give you directions. We could have just followed that car!"

"Cows aren't as stupid as they look –." He tried to lighten the mood, but I just glared, refusing to look at his exceptionally persuasive face. He began to mutter, and I was surprised I caught it. "I didn't hear that car coming…"

"Right, like there's nobody driving it or something. Now, how about you give me your cell phone, and I'll call Alice, and ask if there's civilization nearby." I tried reason.

His face visibly fell. I felt my jaw drop open in realization. "You don't have your cell phone!"

He tried to explain. "I didn't want us to be interrupted during dinner."

I was fuming – I had no idea what was leaving my mouth, though it was something to the effect of "stupid, arrogant, vampire boyfriends."

"Listen, Bella," Edward interrupted my increasingly ridiculous rant, "I love you, and I am most certainly not going to let you get hungry or lost, okay?"

I nodded, feeling a little silly for doubting my boyfriend. He did care for me, and he was a vampire – how much trouble could we fall into?

"Could you run ahead?" I suggested. He would get there faster than any car, any day.

"I'm not leaving you," He insisted, "you'll attract the only other traffic for miles, and it'll end up being someone dangerous."

"I'm glad you think so highly of my luck," I pouted, and then smirked. He was right – I was far worse than the average danger magnet.

As we sat in the car, watching the fading sky and trying to decide whether to continue on ahead or turn around, another speeding car passed us by.

"Go Edward!" I yelled, right as he yelled out the open window, "It's not safe to drive without thinking!"

"I don't think they heard you." I slid down in my seat. My stomach had become very demanding in the past hour, and I was certain that we were late for our reservation.

"Okay," Edward began, "here's the plan. I've got my hand on the ignition, and my eyes on the rear view -."

Another car had sped by.

"What's wrong with me today?" He was visibly trying to not crush the steering wheel as he started the car and sped up. "There must be a town nearby."

"Yeah, positive thinking," I realized that I was breathing heavily at the sudden velocity of the vehicle.

I shrieked at our even more sudden stop a minute later. "What the -!" I noticed three expensive cars sitting single file, in the shoulder, a few hundred feet behind us. "What's going on, Edward?" I whispered, suddenly nervous.

"My family," He said, appearing at my side and opening the door, "seemed to think it would be amusing to mock me in my moment of weakness."

I stepped out of the car, relief evident on my face. Alice bounded over, wildly taunting her brother with "I saw it! I saw you getting lost! And we blocked you out! Hah!"

Rosalie, Jasper, and Emmett came to join us, Rosalie carrying a basket of warm food. She politely handed it to me, saying, "Esme made this for you."

"Thanks!" My voice was high pitched with glee for my future sister's improved attitude, but more so for the food.

"Someone's hungry," Emmett chortled as I eagerly devoured a chicken wing. "Carlisle wished it to be known that neither he, nor Esme, in any way condoned our behavior this evening."

"Between hoots of laughter," Jasper added, all the while calming Edward from advancing upon his siblings in a fit of rage.

As we stood, chatting and hanging out like any normal teenagers lost in the middle of nowhere, a thought hit me. I couldn't help but voice it, though my mouth was full of warm biscuits.

"What is ith wif men ad athking for directions?"


End file.
